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It’s probably not what it sounds like.
Photo by cottonbro studio
“Spicy Chips”
These are Cheetos — not the spicy ones, just the regular ones. My child does not have anything close to an accurate understanding of what spices are.
“Cream”
This refers to Neosporin or any generic version of antibiotic ointment. Do not let her self administer the cream unless you have a large supply of cream.
“The Lion God”
This is Disney’s 2016 series The Lion Guard. It is basically The Lion King 2.0. However, it is NOT The Lion King. Do not put on The Lion King unless you want to answer a hundred questions about what “dead” means. As you may have guessed, my child is not aware that “God” and “guard” are pronounced differently. She is also not aware that these refer to different things. Please avoid taking her to churches, airports, and shopping malls until this particular confusion passes.
“Orange Juice”
She is NOT asking for orange juice. She is asking for an orange beverage that contains roughly 2% juice and is known to most people as SunnyD. My child learned about SunnyD at a recent kid party, and its existence has never fully escaped her attention since. Please tell her that the grocery store is out of it, again.
“Sissers”
This almost certainly means scissors, however, an important follow up question to this request is why? Less commonly, this could refer to a pair of girls she met at a park who are either sisters or just happen to both have blonde hair. You can rule this option out by handing her a pair of scissors and seeing how she responds. If she appears satisfied, please do not forget the follow up question mentioned earlier.
“Twilight”
This could refer to any one of the hundreds of movies and shows that were made for generations 1, 2, 3, 4, or 5 of the My Little Pony universe, as well as those that take place in the parallel world of anthropomorphized horses known as Equestria Girls. (And, yes, I know that the unicorn pony named Twilight Sparkle wasn’t formally created until generation 4, but to my small child, all purple ponies are “Twilight”.) Each of the My Little Pony movies and shows exists intermittently on a haphazard rotation of various streaming sites. You will need to subscribe to all of them to check the current offerings, but, usually, the particular episode she wants is the one that is temporarily unavailable.
“Sauce”
If she is having ice cream, this means chocolate syrup. If noodles are involved, this means pasta sauce. In all other contexts, this is ketchup.
“Napkin”
This could be a paper napkin, a paper towel, a piece of bathroom tissue, or a Kleenex. It could also be a cloth napkin, because we are not complete barbarians! However, you should not supply her with a cloth napkin until you have identified what she intends to use it for.
“Little Mermaid”
This is neither the Disney original movie nor the recent live action remake. This is her tiniest plastic mermaid toy. It is so tiny that it often gets lost in couch cushions, loose car seat padding, sink drains, bathtub drains, gaps in deck boards, and, more often than you’d think, the small pockets beneath baseboards. If you have already called a plumber and torn up all your flooring, it might finally be lost for good.
“Paul”
Despite what it sounds like, she is not asking for someone named Paul. She does not know anyone named Paul because nobody names their kid Paul anymore. She is either asking for the missing “pearl” from her preschool craft project or her stuffed polar bear named “Pole”. Both of these sound exactly like “Paul”.
“Paw-tee!!”
This could refer to an upcoming birthday party or a dire need to use a toilet. When in doubt, it’s best to play it safe and quickly escort her to the nearest restroom.
“Poopy”
Unfortunately, this is EXACTLY what it sounds like, and it doesn’t mean she needs to go, it means she already went. Hopefully, you chose to play it safe.
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Jarastyle – #Small #Child #ForA #Guide #Amy #Greenlee #Jul
Courtesy : https://thebelladonnacomedy.com/what-is-my-small-child-asking-for-a-guide-bc1543a9a833?source=rss—-e9e22d25fb5e—4