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These tumblers may contain BPA’s because sometimes there’s a price for hot-shit tumblers and that price is cancer.
Photo by paje victoria on Unsplash
I’m a mom. I love wine. Personalized wine-spiration is what I’m about. And I’m having a big sale in my #WineMom Etsy store. IFYKYK. That means If you know, you know, That’s for all the people that don’t know.
I’m almost sold out of my hot-shit wine tumbler in bitching seafoam that says “Wine o’clock.” How funny is that? Instead of a time that actually exists, like “10 o’clock”, it says “wine o’clock.” In fancy cursive. CURSIVE. Bet you don’t see that every day.
Perhaps you’d be more interested in a kick-ass tumbler that’s Beyonce Lemonade yellow with an 80s-style typeface that screams “Wine Not?” Because why not wine? Why. not. Wine. Not. Get it? If you say the words “why” and “not” sort of fast, it kind of sounds like “Wine Not.” You probably didn’t get it at first. It’s THAT clever. These aren’t dishwasher safe — not even the top rack.
Other optional sayings are “Wine is cheaper than therapy” because even if you have health insurance that provides mental health coverage, the out-of-pocket gets pretty pricey, whereas you can just get a decent two-buck chuck at Trader Joe’s to ease your mental anguish. That’s just basic math.
The lids ARE dishwasher safe, so put them in the top rack, bottom rack, I don’t give a shit, but they’re sold separately. They’re not even funny so I don’t know why you’d even bother.
“Could be coffee, could be wine” should be one of our bestsellers, but it’s not. I think it just gives people too much uncertainty as to whether you’re drinking wine or coffee, and I guess if you’re the designated mom this weekend to take the kids to early morning soccer practice, people want to be sure it’s coffee and not wine in that Luke Skywalker green tumbler that’s absolutely the tits.
These tumblers may contain BPA’s so just sack up, Nancy, because sometimes there’s a price for hot-shit tumblers and that price is cancer.
Iron-on t-shirts and onesies, handmade greeting cards, leather earrings and bracelets, paper banners and party decorations, and custom stickers — I don’t do any of that shit. Just bomb-ass tumblers, with winetastic sayings written in slammin’ calligraphy you sometimes see in those “live laugh love” signs.
I have a limited supply of “Working wine to five” in Airbnb pillow orange with Dolly Parton imagined penmanship. There was a movie a long time ago called “Nine to five” about women who were subjugated at work and dreamed of getting revenge on their boss. Dolly Parton starred and sang the theme song with the lyrics “Working nine to five,” but this fine AF tumbler says “Working to wine to five,” and everyone that’s a Dolly Parton fan who also loves wine will probably be obsessed with you for your wordplay. Shipping is extra — you think it’s cheap to make these fine-ass wine praising-tumblers? It’s not. I’m about to default on my mortgage.
Finally, the black tumbler that just says “Wine” in Times New Roman is back in stock.
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Jarastyle – #HotShit #Winemom #Tumblers #Bangin #Etsy #Store #Cara #Marino
Courtesy : https://thebelladonnacomedy.com/get-your-hot-shit-winemom-tumblers-in-my-bangin-etsy-store-390ffaba54db?source=rss—-e9e22d25fb5e—4