Daily Itinerary of a Mom Whose Kids Texted Her For a Ride | by Stacey Curran | May, 2023 – Jarastyle

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Cell phones make parenting much easier

Stacey CurranThe Belladonna ComedyPhoto by SOCMIA Fotografía on Unsplash

12:00 pm: Drop son at basketball practice.

12:30 pm: Drop daughter at a mall two miles away.

2:00 pm: Daughter texts you to pick her up at a different mall than the one you left her at, because she met up with Paisley and Ava at the first mall, who don’t even like that place, so Paisley’s mom gave them a ride to a “better” mall, 16 miles away. That woman never says no to her kids for Christ sake.

2:15 pm: Your son, who was supposed to call you after basketball, but walked to Sam’s house instead, texted to say he might go to Jayden’s if Sam has an extra bike, but if not, can you pick them up? Your daughter, and Paisley, and Ava are expecting you, so you tell him to wait, and you’ll get him soon.

2:30 pm: Your older daughter texts to say she just saw Sam on a bike, pulling your son on a skateboard. She reports that neither were wearing a helmet.

3:11 pm: Your husband calls and you answer on speaker just as your kid, and Paisley, and Ava, climb into the car at the fancy mall. He starts saying Paisley’s mom needs to learn to say no to her kids, who are already spoiled brats.

3:13 pm: You hang up quickly. But not quickly enough.

3:15 pm: You get a call from Paisley’s mom. You tell your passengers you won’t be answering, because you don’t want to talk while driving. Your kid announces that you always do.

3:30 pm: Paisley’s mom really wants to speak with you about your husband’s comment, and Siri reads her many angry texts aloud, even as you slap at the dashboard helplessly.

4:00 pm: You drive out of your way to drop Paisley off first. You disconnect your phone from Bluetooth. Paisley’s mom is coming out the door, but you drive away.

4:15 pm: Your son is texting your daughter asking why you aren’t answering, and asking why Paisley’s brother is now at Jayden’s house, yelling at him. He asks if you can pick him up there right now and drive Sam home, and can a bike and a skateboard fit in the car?

4:18 pm: You tell your daughter to text back that he will have to wait while you drop off Ava and then there will be room for Sam, and the bike, and the skateboard. She asks why you can’t just text him yourself. You consider grabbing her phone and throwing it out the window, but remember how much you paid for it.

4:25 pm: While you sit at a red light, and you’ve sat at every damn one, all damn day, your other daughter careens through a yellow. You see she is texting behind the wheel. You open the window and start screaming at her, as Ava records you and sends it to her parents.

4:40 pm: You drop off Ava, and her parents don’t come out, but they glare at you from the window.

4:55 pm: You go get your son, and Sam, who emerges without a bike or a skateboard, but with Paisley’s brother, and Jayden instead. Your daughter yells that she is squished and wants to go home right now, so she gets out and texts her sister to pick her up.

5:05 pm: You drive halfway to Sam’s house before Paisley’s brother starts telling your son to tell you that they are going to McDonald’s, which you passed already. You turn around, squeezing the steering wheel so you don’t freak the frig out. No one mentioned McDonald’s, even as you rolled right past it.

5:20 pm: You pull in, and tell your son to wait so you can yell at him about this detour. He says that he texted you, and you never answered so he texted his sister about it, and it’s not his fault she didn’t tell you.

5:45 pm: You get home and your daughters tell you they are texting their brother about how embarrassing you were today. You tell them to tell him that they are the ones who should be embarrassed.

6:10 pm: Your husband texts that your son is texting him for a ride home because you aren’t answering. You tell him he is at McDonald’s and it would be great if he could grab him because you cannot drive anywhere else today or you will lose it.

6:10 pm: Your husband calls from McDonald’s and says your son isn’t there. You check your son’s location and he is now at the “better” mall 16 miles away. You text him in all caps “HOW DID YOU GET THERE?” He replies that Paisley’s brother texted his mom, and she took them.

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